The More You Give, The More People Seem To Expect

We meet again!

Before I get into my topic for this post, I am going to preface by saying this is directed at NO ONE. If you're a friend of mine reading this, and maybe I've paid for something for you or whatever, don't take this personally. The people who were repeat offenders are no longer in my life. So please, no texts later asking me about my post because I will simply send you a middle finger GIF in response. So... there's your warning.

Anyways, I'm not sure if this is going to resonate with anyone or not, but it means something to me.

Why is it that the more giving you are, the more people expect and take from you? 

I have been noticing this more and more with each passing year that I grow. What is even more amazing is that this has happened to my parents as well, over and over again, and I just never noticed. Now that I am old enough to understand and talk to them about it, I realize that this is something that we will battle our entire lives. 

I have always been taught to be thankful for everything I have and to everyone who has helped me.  It seems that this very important life lesson hasn't been passed down to everyone. And don't get me wrong, this doesn't apply to everyone in my life. I have plenty of people in my life who contribute and/or will take turns paying with me. For example: my best friend and I have a routine...if I drive, she pays. If she drives, I pay. It's been that way for years and it works. We both take care of each other, as friends should. My brother and I call "treatsies" - meaning we call dibs on paying. And we're pretty even in winning that game. Again, we both take care of each other. 

It's those people who are perfectly fine with not paying their way. I can gladly say that I will NEVER understand that. I've known people who would come out to go eat, we'd eat and when the check came, it was an excruciating waiting game to see if they'd grab the check or even take a look at it. Did they!?  Nope, they were waiting for me to grab it. Me, wanting to get out of there, would usually just grab the bill, pay it and accept a "I'll pay you back." I hate to say it, but that usually doesn't happen. It's actually kind of sad how excited I get when people actually do pay me back. 

Things are changing though. This isn't necessarily the fault of the people who aren't paying their fair share, it's my fault. It's my fault for enabling the situation. It's my fault for allowing this behavior and letting the "I'll pay you back" promises go. This won't be happening much longer because as I grow, I learn. Generosity is one thing, being used is another.

I guess if I can offer any advice, just take care of each other. Don't let one friend pay for everything because truth is, they're probably sick over it. If someone always drives, maybe offer to put $10 in their tank. If you go to dinner with someone and they pay, offer to tip! And hey, if you tell someone you're going to pay them back, actually do it. Don't just try to ignore it and hope they forget. That is the worst, and most hurtful offense. Not only are you lying about the intention to pay them back, but you're acting like they're stupid enough to forget that you're in debt to them. 

Anyways - that's my vent session. For you freeloaders, stop taking advantage of people. For you people who pay your way and help your friends out, THANK YOU! You are a rare breed who is appreciated. <3

-KG

Hate VS Dislike

Looks like this first post is coming sooner than I had anticipated, but I had a thought so I figure I will run with it.

I tend to be a pretty "fair player" when it comes to people in life. Granted, I am far from perfect and still have a lot of growing up to do, but I tend to give people a fair chance the first time I meet them. Have I questioned this tactic? YUP. Why? Because I've been fooled by a first impression more than a few times. Despite those times, I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and a fair chance right off the bat.

While I have been really good at giving that first chance, I have also been REALLY good at giving too many chances. I will let someone run me into the ground and wear me down to dust before I tell them to get the fuck out of my life. And even then, I probably won't word it like that at the fear of hurting their feelings. I would usually find nicer, more gentle wording to say it. Granted, I've had to do this a few times in my life and it never gets easier.

Side note for you youngsters: Your 20's are filled with cutting people out, so get ready for it. I also imagine that it doesn't stop in your 20's... or 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's... etc. 

Now, while in an encounter with someone who I cut from my life due to negative energy a while back, they asked why I "HATE" them. *Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech* of the breaks, back up now. First off, I HATE no one. My mom always taught me that it is wrong to hate people. That and HATE  takes so much energy, that of which I refuse to waste on someone who I don't particularly care for. Second, I don't WANT to hate anyone... I hate things like overly spicy food, root beer (I know...) and bugs. I don't feel like hating someone does anything for me and I refuse to do it.

But, since I mentioned it... what the hell is with overly spicy food? I know, before a troll goes "uhhh we all have different spice tolerance..durrrr" - YES I know. Thank you for that nugget of knowledge, but considering that mine is very low, that makes this hot hell food more confusing to me. How can you even taste anything other than fire? How do you not want to throw up your esophagus while its engulfed in lava?! Anyways, these are the things that go through my head...

I also have a tendency to bounce thoughts around like a pinball machine, might be the radio in me. :) 

Now - back to the topic at hand. I won't lie, there are a few people in my life that I have had to take a step back from. Whether it is because I don't agree with the moves they're making in life, because they've done something to me and/or someone I love that I can't be alright with or whatever it may be. I've had to make cuts. People might think I'm cold hearted, which isn't the case. Truth is, even with the people who I have had to respectfully tell that I can't continue our friendship, I still wonder how they are. I still hope they're ok and I still hope that they have the best life that can be offered to them. I never cut someone with any ill will wish.
It's just a separation or a creation of some space while hoping for some change. That's all.

Then there is an issue of being an introverted extrovert. People who know me, and when I say know me I mean people who have been in my life for years, know that I am loud, crazy, adventurous, loud mouthed and I attempt to be as fun as possible. Now if you're around me just sometimes and think that I don't like you because I was quiet, you're wrong. Certain circumstances allow me to be my crazy extroverted self, and some circumstances turn me into a turtle that is hiding in it's shell.

Anyways as random as this is, it was on my mind. Now that it's off my mind, I'm going to the local watering hole...
...it's 5 O'Clock somewhere right?

Again, HAPPY FRIDAY!
kg

New Day and a New Blog!

Hello again everyone!

I hope is well in all of your worlds. Things are great in mine! Busy, but great.

Some of you are probably wondering why I have started ANOTHER blog completely separate from my old "Katie's Cognition" blog. Well, that blog I feel should be dedicated to the process I went through to lose now 57 lbs and the journey I took. I don't want for that information to get bogged down by my random thoughts and rants because some of you are still using it for reference! I have  been so amazed by the response to that blog and how many people have been messaging me telling me that it has helped them! So I figure we'll just leave that one be, and start a new writing journey over here!

Now, as for my title I'll Have a Beer, Shot of Whiskey and a Cheeseburger. Thanks. You might be wondering why I chose that. Well first of all, my last blog was all about how I was eating egg whites, kale, cardboard (kidding), fat free everything and drinking water. So this one is going to be a little more "meat and potatoes" if you will. I want to write about my thoughts, things that make me happy, things that piss me off, my favorite foods, funny things that happen and more. If you're looking for my health stuff, please click HERE. Of course, I might mention how I am maintaining or post a few photos of a cool hike I go on, but this blog won't be health centered.

This particular post is just an intro. I will make sure to check in soon and write something for your reading pleasure :)

Cheers to you, my friends! Happy Friday!